Sunday, 27 September 2009
scientists evidence
I have recently been on a very interesting site called impactlab which has reported their findings on a scientific investigation in the USA, which states how children who are spanked have lower IQs than children who are disciplined in other ways. What really amuses me is how can anybody be shocked by these findings? I'm certainly not surprised as i feel that children who are spanked regularly are taking a beating to their self esteem which has an affect on their emotional well being. If a child's emotional development is affected in this way then, of course, it will have a knock on effect on all other areas of development especially their cognitive development.
Headlice!!!
Now all the children have settled back into school after their holidays, us parents have another issue to overcome - the dreaded head-lice!!! i am inviting you to comment on what experiences you have had with head-lice and what the best thing is to get rid of them and to keep them from coming back.
so far i have only found 2 solutions which actually kill all the lice and their eggs but it does come at a price - they are really strong, overnight, solutions made with chemicals. i have tried the 10 minute treatments but they don't seem to work. I've tried tea tree oil, vinegar, lemon juice, olive oil, and have recently invested in the robi comb which supposedly zaps the little creatures and kills them - all i can say is i wish it did!!!
so can anyone help me with your suggestions so the next time i have to treat my children, i wont have to use heavily dosed chemical solutions.
so far i have only found 2 solutions which actually kill all the lice and their eggs but it does come at a price - they are really strong, overnight, solutions made with chemicals. i have tried the 10 minute treatments but they don't seem to work. I've tried tea tree oil, vinegar, lemon juice, olive oil, and have recently invested in the robi comb which supposedly zaps the little creatures and kills them - all i can say is i wish it did!!!
so can anyone help me with your suggestions so the next time i have to treat my children, i wont have to use heavily dosed chemical solutions.
Children learn what they live
I just want to share this well known verse with you as i feel it is perfect!
If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn,
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight,
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy,
If a child lives with shame, he learns to be guilty,
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient,
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence,
If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate,
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice,
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith,
If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself,
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world.
If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn,
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight,
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy,
If a child lives with shame, he learns to be guilty,
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient,
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence,
If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate,
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice,
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith,
If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself,
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world.
Wednesday, 26 August 2009
support for parents of children with an autistic spectrum disorder
As a mum of 3 children i know how having support is essential. It is essential not only for the children to have different adults in their lives to learn from but it is also essential for the parents.A family which has a child with an autistic spectrum disorder has a whole different set of obstacles to deal with and this can be totally overwhelming.When my son was born it wasn't long before i realized there was something different with his behaviour than the other children of his age. I suppose i was lucky really that i was able to notice his strange behaviours but most of all, accept there may have been an underlying problem. This all became very noticeable from between the ages of 18 months and 2 years. Other children were learning to socialise at toddler group whilst my son was finding 'being nice' a huge mountain to overcome.
Soon he stood out from the crowd as the other children's social and emotional skills were developing at a normal rate and yet he could not mix with them in a proper manner. He was unaware of this at that particular time of his life so it wasn't a problem for him at all. It was me who was really feeling the alienation due to his behaviour. Other mum's would meet up at each other's houses and chat while their little ones played happily together and of course it wasn't long before i wasn't invited. This is where the support started to break down, when really i was in need of it more than them.
As my son grew older there were times when his disorder was noticeable and other times when it wasn't so noticeable and there were 'friends' (and i use that term loosely) that started to drift away from me, or worse still would look upon my son as a 'naughty' child with a mum who obviously couldn't control her child!
Still we had no diagnosis to explain or understand why he was the way he was - but all along i knew exactly what it was so i was as understanding of his fustrations as i could be. I could look into his eyes and see the most beautiful soul that most other people refused to see.
There was the odd person who actually could see him the way i did but most others didn't! What i started to notice was the people who had the time,patience and understanding brought out the best in him; whereas those who couldn't be bothered to look beyond the quirky behaviours most certainly did not!
I could write so much on the struggle of bringing up a child with these difficulties and i'm sure other families who have children with an ASD would be able to relate to them fully. But what i am trying to emphasise is support is a necessity for the families and complete understanding of the child is a must! My son is now 14 years old and has all the support he deserves at school since having the diagnosis of Autistic Spectrum Disorder. He is in a 'normal' secondary school and mixes to the best of his abilities and is constantly battling with being able to control his emotions and fustrations. The most predominent feature of his personality now is that he is the most warmest, kindest individual i know and i truly believe that it is because i never gave up on seeing his true soul, but most of all because i do have some real true friends now who also have nurtured the side of him that was in need of understanding and love rather than only seeing the outbursts of fustrations , because i know, if we all as adults, see any child as being 'bad' or 'naughty' or not worth helping them that's exactly what they will become!!
So if you, as a parent, are living through this at the moment then you are not alone and my advice to you is chose your friends wisely and most of all is never let the outbursts out way the beautiful person your child truly is.
There are many sites that have a wonderful support network with people who are going through similar experiences as your familly so get in touch with them.
Soon he stood out from the crowd as the other children's social and emotional skills were developing at a normal rate and yet he could not mix with them in a proper manner. He was unaware of this at that particular time of his life so it wasn't a problem for him at all. It was me who was really feeling the alienation due to his behaviour. Other mum's would meet up at each other's houses and chat while their little ones played happily together and of course it wasn't long before i wasn't invited. This is where the support started to break down, when really i was in need of it more than them.
As my son grew older there were times when his disorder was noticeable and other times when it wasn't so noticeable and there were 'friends' (and i use that term loosely) that started to drift away from me, or worse still would look upon my son as a 'naughty' child with a mum who obviously couldn't control her child!
Still we had no diagnosis to explain or understand why he was the way he was - but all along i knew exactly what it was so i was as understanding of his fustrations as i could be. I could look into his eyes and see the most beautiful soul that most other people refused to see.
There was the odd person who actually could see him the way i did but most others didn't! What i started to notice was the people who had the time,patience and understanding brought out the best in him; whereas those who couldn't be bothered to look beyond the quirky behaviours most certainly did not!
I could write so much on the struggle of bringing up a child with these difficulties and i'm sure other families who have children with an ASD would be able to relate to them fully. But what i am trying to emphasise is support is a necessity for the families and complete understanding of the child is a must! My son is now 14 years old and has all the support he deserves at school since having the diagnosis of Autistic Spectrum Disorder. He is in a 'normal' secondary school and mixes to the best of his abilities and is constantly battling with being able to control his emotions and fustrations. The most predominent feature of his personality now is that he is the most warmest, kindest individual i know and i truly believe that it is because i never gave up on seeing his true soul, but most of all because i do have some real true friends now who also have nurtured the side of him that was in need of understanding and love rather than only seeing the outbursts of fustrations , because i know, if we all as adults, see any child as being 'bad' or 'naughty' or not worth helping them that's exactly what they will become!!
So if you, as a parent, are living through this at the moment then you are not alone and my advice to you is chose your friends wisely and most of all is never let the outbursts out way the beautiful person your child truly is.
There are many sites that have a wonderful support network with people who are going through similar experiences as your familly so get in touch with them.
The end of the holidays
During this summer holidays i had a terrible time thinking of things to do with the children that would be different and not expensive but i seemed to come up with the same old things - local park, swimming and even at home my 3 were constantly bored!!! well now it's coming to the end of the holidays i find lots of suggestions on this link . i know it's too late now really but i found the site quite useful with new ideas to occupy the children even if we won't be doing them until the october holidays!!!
so here goes.......
well as you may have read on my profile i am a mum and i work with children, so no clues what my blogs are going to be all about! anything to do with children, all children from my own childrens' experiences and what they have taught me, pre-school childrens' contribution to my life, friends children, all the children at the school i'm currently working in and last but most definately not least the young man i am helping ( and he's helping me) at the moment. I believe ALL children have such potential to become pleasant, happy and well balanced people and there are no differences in their pure souls just in their human emotions - which we as adults are ultimately responsible for helping them to understand and deal with thoses emotions.
Gosh that's a fairly heavy start to my first blog but i can promise you there will be much lighter, funnier moments to share. Also any advise on parenting can be shared amongst us but at all times i must insist that all children remain nameless or given a pseudonim to protect them fully.
please start posting your contributions.
Gosh that's a fairly heavy start to my first blog but i can promise you there will be much lighter, funnier moments to share. Also any advise on parenting can be shared amongst us but at all times i must insist that all children remain nameless or given a pseudonim to protect them fully.
please start posting your contributions.
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